Australians don’t have sex they mate! Know what happens ONLY in Australia
Australians don’t have sex they mate!
Mate is one of the most commonly used terms to address people formally (depending on the field of work) and informally in Australia. Your boss may use it, your lecturer may use it and even people who do not like you may use it to get your attention! It’s like saying “bro” or “dude”. Let’s hangout for coffee “mate”!
If you were expecting Ed Sheeran or Beyonce to perform at the St Kilda festival, you would be mistaken. The cultural festivals and events revolve around local acts. They are fun, full of vibrant ideas and talented performers. The local bands and artists are one of a kind. Even if you usually only listen to Top 40 bangers, you’re likely to find an unknown band or artist that makes your night.
While we’re talking about local artists, the local produce in Australia is also fantastic! It is fresh, aromatic and delicious! The farmers and local growers are highly respected here. Check out the farmer’s bazaars or fresh produce sales to stock up your pantry with some amazing dairy products and wine. The wineries also have fun activities like berry picking, crushing and wine tastings (which are the best!)
Talking, whispering, I’ve got my ears on you!
Trying to have a private conversation? Well you can’t! The walls are super thin and you can hear almost everything. TV shows, music and sometimes even keyboard clicks. Want to get intimate with your date? One word of advice… Don’t!
Coffee shops shut
If you’re thinking of taking your date to a coffee shop after work instead… Sorry, but that is not an option. The coffee shops generally shut around 5pm. The sun doesn’t even set at 5pm! What is this about Australia!? The amount of times plans will have to be remade because the coffee shop you wanted to go to is shut is ridiculous!
People here know their coffee! From the first drop of espresso to the last chocolate sprinkle. There is an oat milk latte, almond latte, sesame latte, purple latte, glitter latte and probably unicorn latte too!
Nobody gets them delivered to their home. You can catch news on the
television or podcasts but rarely at your doorstep. Unless you consider gossip about your neighbours news.
“Throw another PRAWN on the Barbie!”
Anzac Day, Christmas Day, Boxing Day (the most celebrated holidays) and basically every other holiday are an excuse to get your mates together for a good ol’ BBQ! You’d think there would be a “National Barbeque Day” since Australians can always
find reason to light up the barbie. Have you been to Bunnings? Well, you should try their charity barbecues. It is a sacred ritual that officially baptizes you as a true blue Aussie.
Welcome to the future
Australia is ahead of everyone, everywhere! It is 5 and a half ahead hours of India, nearly 10 hours ahead of France., 7 hours ahead of Middle East and… I am not even going to attempt to calculate how far ahead of the United States it is! So next time you’re chatting to your Aussie mates ask them, “How is it living in the future?”
Team Melbourne Vibe
(Author: Vedant Agarwal)
(Editor: Bridget Smallwood)
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